Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Summer's here?

I think feelings are like your skin, they eventually peel off. Whether its love, hate, anger, disappointment or even happiness. They always peel off and similar to skin, they are replaced by new ones, love is soon replaced by hate or sometimes even nothingness. I feel like i have been lying in this pool of nothingness for the longest time now. It's not the best and its not the worst. It makes you feel.... nothing. Can't complain.

Right now, if i want, i can totally get out if bed, make a list of things to do this summer, work on my short term and long term goals and achieve something. But i am so tired right now. I am. Not exhausted, but im just so sick of being this money minting machine that the entire thing has become redundant, monotonous and boring really. Its almost been a week since i got off work and i spent all that time with ppl who i promised hanging out with. I felt like it was a debt i was paying off. And these are real, actual people that i am talking about, and as i met them i kept on doing that imaginary calculation thing in my head that my mom does when she's buying her groceries. (ohmygod i get it from ma.). So it was pretty much like

1 xwz
3 shkkd
4 mmll and lsks
5 opbnek
6 joxk, ankd, ajkdd's baby

No.5 and No.6 are friends who are leaving soon. So there's another formality there.

Yipee. Here's to Summer 2013!


Sunday, June 2, 2013

Yes, Man!

This past year was filled with me facing my past ghosts; ones i feared hated me, loathed me or worse had forgotten me. But i put up a strong face and i met them, each one of them. Still, i have not become the person i would want to be. I still get awed by people and their coolness and i end up doing the wrong kind of things. Like that lead actress in good fellas.  I wish i had a friend like me, who'd give me some sane, rational advice. Perhaps a future me? Because honestly on the account of not listening to any gibberish advice from people my age i have completely stopped opening my little big yap of a mouth. Is that bad? Is that normal? Is it ok?

Also, on the occasion of listening to people talking about how i am so judgmental i have decided to conquer those feelings and lay in bed and hangout with not so cool people. And Say Yes!

So here i am, saying yes. Yes to life, to people, to new endeavors, to new sweet memories!

Also it's zoya's birthday on Monday. I wish i could do alot. I really do.

Now Listening to

Moby - Moby - Sailin' On

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